One thought ... if a generic "first reaction" is hard to get your head around, consider posting the most memorable moment in the book so far, and why you think it's important. Have fun!
I have really enjoyed reading the first six chapter of All But My Life. So far it is very interesting. The most memorable part of the book so far for me is when Gerda is thinking about a family who committed suicide and she wished her family had considered it as well. Her father does not have the ability to read minds, but he just knew that those thoughts were going through her head. He made her promise that no matter what happened she would never rely on suicide as an escape method. She said that with many more years ahead of her she “remembered that promise as [her] most sacred vow” (32). After reading the first six chapters it seems as though when Gerda makes a promise to someone or when someone tells her something important she cherishes it. She does not just make the promise and then later on forget about it. Another example when Gerda cherishes words that are spoken to her was when she was talking with her brother. He gave her a few pieces of glass and told her to keep the faith and to never forget it. Just like when she was told by her father, she never forgot those words. I think that her remembering all these words is important because it might have gotten her through all the horrible times. She might have been on her last string and then suddenly remembered what her father or brother had told her and remembering those words made her stay strong. As we continue reading maybe we will find evidence for this.
I agree with Britt; the mere fact that Gerda is considering suicide as one of her few possibilities is very disturbing. I'm also glad that she has respect for her father's wishes to never succumb to that desire to just escape reality once and for all. To continue that thought, it seems that everyone in Gerda’s family has a lot of respect for one another. They are always looking out for one another to keep them safe, but at the same time they are not so constricting that they cause unhappiness or discomfort. One of the first examples we see of this closeness is when Gerda and Arthur’s Papa ask for his children to go to Poland with neighbors to keep safe. Arthur immediately responds by saying, “No! We are going to stay together” (6). Many nights Gerda sits by her sick father’s bedside to keep close to him for both of their sakes. She even goes against what seems to be her nature to lie to her parents about the falsely reported well-being of her brother Arthur. I think that as the book goes on, Gerda’s closeness and trust with her family will help in the struggle to survive, as it helped countless other Jewish families during the Nazi Holocaust.
Both of you have great ideas on the opening of the book and about Gerda's idea of suicide. What absolutely confuses me is that Gerda and her family seem to be so clueless to the fact that the Polish cannot defend themselves. Also, they seem not to care if the Polish lose the war because they want to stay at home. Wouldn't it seem to be an obvious decision to try to protect your family to leave? The mother says their main concern is taking care of her husband. However, her husband may be dead if he stays anyways. I simply cannot get past the fact that they are so naive to the danger right in front of their faces. I was also wondering why Gerda seemed to make such a small deal about the letter from a friend in Turkey saying that they could come to stay with him. It seems they had opportunities to leave with a good reason to leave, but they stayed without a good reason. Finally, because Gerda writes poor english, I feel like her symbolism is forced and sometimes confusing. For example, the changing of the Polish flag to the Nazi flag could have been portrayed better and been given a deeper meaning. The first time I read that page I had to reread because the flag scene confused me.
When I was starting the book, I thought that I would not be able to know what it was like to be her. This is almost a shame because to know what it is like to be someone else can help expand you as a person and connect to people, and what we are reading can teach us so much about being humans. I was surprised at the end that I was more willing to imagine what it would be like to be her, as hard as it was. I marveled at how her life could keep going on, and I think she did not understand, either. While I was reading and she was talking about how there was a silence over the family, I felt like I could feel that silence over them. Like, it was too much to face, and they could not admit what was going to themselves, let alone each other. I think this book will be hard to read, but I hope to learn something from it. -Eva
I agree with Britt and Deirdre especially. When I first started reading this book, I was anxious to see how the Holocaust would play into Gerda’s story. I was surprised to find how subtly it incorporated into her life. Her family was not driven away from their home, they weren’t forced into camps, the actually hid very well. What stood out to me most was the relationship of the family. I think it is beautiful and very honest that they stayed together during these hard times. Because, even though their fate seems pretty doomed, they might as well stay together and make the most of it. What stood out to me most was how Gerda kept such a secret from her family. She knew all along that her brother Arthur wasn’t necessarily safe and that their family was receiving false information, but she didn’t tell her mother or father. I think it is clear that she did this because she wanted to protect them. For once, her family had the opportunity to be joyous and she wanted to keep it that way. I think that this shows a lot about Gerda’s character. She has good intentions but never is really sure when to draw the line. She is still young and I bet that we will learn how this lack of maturity affects her decision making. Though telling her parents was acceptable since Arthur turned out to be safe anyway, if he was dead and they had no idea, it would be far more traumatizing in the end.
It's awful that Gerda was separated from her parents and soon afterward learned of their deaths, but to look on the bright side, I think she is very lucky compared to other children during the Holocaust. Firstly, she is taken to a camp where she is treated almost with respect by the director and even more so by Frau Kugler, as opposed to being treated as if unworthy of living in a concentration camp, which was a common fate of many Jews her age. She also is able to maintain contact with Abek and her uncle in Turkey, and remain with her childhood friend Ilse for many months. Despite her separation from her parents, Gerda manages to keep her spirits up (as much as possible). If I were in her shoes, I would not have had the strength that Gerda maintains. For example, the first day that she is sent to a camp, she goes into the director's office without permission and demands a pass to Abek's family, which ended up gaining her the respect of the director, a benefit later on. I also don't think I would have had the courage and integrity that Gerda has displayed, such as when she declines the offer to stay with Abek's family because she knows she is not truly in love with him and can never reciprocate the sacrifices that he has made for her.
So to support my point that Gerda does not want to marry Abek because she feels guilty about the sacrifices that he has made for her, on page 109 she says, "It occurred to me that if I refused to marry Abek, he would never demand it against my wishes. But I couldn't accept his family's sacrifice and reject him." I think it is noble of Gerda to not take the easy way out and stay with Abek's family, but instead to consider the long-term effects of this decision and recognize that she will never be able to love Abek and repay him for his sacrifices.
From my first blog post I was wondering if there would be any times when Gerda would refer back to when she made the promise to her father that she would not commit suicide. As I continued reading I found that Gerda did mention her promise to her father. Gerda was contemplating committing suicide by jumping in front of a train, but each time she looked at the train she got a pain in her neck. She remembered when she was thinking about death at home when all of a sudden her father came up to her and took hold of her neck “to make [her] look into his eyes, forcing [her] to promise that [she] would never give up” (150). The pain she felt in her neck was a reminder of her promise.
I agree with Deirdre. The separation from her parents was a horrible thing that Gerda had to undergo, and if that was not enough she then learned of their deaths. If I was experiencing all these terrible things I never would have been as strong or as brave as Gerda was. If I were her I might have felt a little relieved knowing that my parents had passed away rather than not knowing at all. It would be a relief knowing that I would not have to wake up every morning wondering if they were dead or alive, or if they were being beaten or starved. I would know for a fact that they are no longer suffering and are in a happier place. They are together and are watching down on me, free from this misery. I also agree with Deirdre when she says that Gerda is lucky is to have Ilse. Having a friend through all this makes the worst situations seem a little better. You can tell that Ilse really cares about Gerda. Ilse is always there for her when she needs someone, and is always there to hold her hand. For example when they are being transferred they are both so scared but they are lucky they have each other. They have each others shoulders to cry on rather than being alone. Also Ilse risks her own life to help Gerda. Gerda was so thankful that she could not even say thank you, she “had no words” (152). I would have been in the same position, speechless.
I totally agree with Deirdre. It is obvious to see how painful it would be to be separated from one's parents especially when Gerda and her family vowed they would stay together early in the book. However, the fact that they assumed that they may actually last together gives me the impression that they were somewhat traumatized and naive to the Nazi invasions. I feel true pity for Gerda because that was what was keeping her sane and together. Also, I believe that Abek's parents helped Gerda a lot too and once they are dead she feels so truly alone. Although she keeps contact with Abek she still feels closer to his parents than him. After Gerda reads Abek's letter she thinks, "[w]hen i put down the letter, I felt anew all the pain I had suffered at separation from Papa and Mama. I was afraid of the future. Abek's parents were gone too, and i felt closer to them than to Abek. They were no more" (135). I believe that the quotation shows that Gerda's separation from her parents was one of the saddest moments that she will always remember.
Sorry, also I do not think it is fair to think about IF we were in Gerda's shoes. The pain must be indescribable, and I cannot imagine what it would be like to have so much happen to me and have my dreams shattered as hers were. The only thing that she now has is Abek, and although she likes him, I still feel the distance she is trying to create between them.
I thought it was very weird how she reacted to her separation, but it was the better option. She gains strength and independence, which is essential for living after the war. She gains a liberty if not having their fate in her hands. I thought when I read that that it was very odd and exactly the opposite of what my reaction would have been. She came to life when they were separated, and I would have died. I think all my strength would have dissipated then. I almost wonder what she was living for, and I think she did, too, but she still had hope and she had her friends. I keep thinking that she reacts differently because her life growing up must have been different than mine, but from how she describes it, I do not think it really was. She was not all that strong when this all started, I wonder why she did not cave in? I think her parents' and her brother's last words to her to be strong guided her, and when I realy think about it, it seems like that would have been enough. -Eva
I agree with all of you guys. Gerda deals with her pain and hard times with an unfathomable amount of courage. She knows that she must make the best out of a nightmare. I think all her days leading up to this point allowed her to be stronger. For months living in a basement without her brother and knowing what was happening all around her, she was expecting it. We can see from her journey just how much she has come mentally. She turned 16 and really grew up then. Not only did she know enough to not accept Abek’s proposal, she dealt with it maturely. I really understood how she feels when she read his book and was annoyed by him because of it. Clearly she cares deeply for him, but marriage is all about love, and she quite obviously doesn’t love him. As for when she is separated from her family, and then finds out about her parents death, I am almost surprised about her reactions to this. Personally, I have no clue as to how I would handle a situation like this, but Gerda remains strong. I think that at a point she realizes there is nothing to lose, so she needs to stay as free-willed as possible. Although it helps that she has it easy to many other Jews her age, her parents are still gone. Her parents and her had made the journey to the camps together. They all helped each other in many ways to survive the long wait to their fate, and to see her without them is weary. At least she has Abek’s parents to fill in some sort of void of comfort inside her because I don’t think that Abek does that very well.
Even though we have not finished the book yet, I love it. As you all know, on a scale from one to ten I give this book a 9.5. I feel so attached to Gerda and Ilse. The friendship that they have formed is so strong. It is something to admire the fact that they are always there for each other. Something as simple as holding hands shows their love and support for one another and it is beautiful. I find Gerda to be such a kind, caring, and thoughtful person. She is always thinking of others and never just herself. When Gerda was hired for her new job she was given an extra bowl of food, the first thing that came to her mind was that “Ilse and I [will] not be hungry any more…” (176). At a horrible time like this, when you are battling day and night for your life you would think someone would keep the food for themselves. That extra bowl of food could be the deciding point of whether you live another day or not. Gerda is too kind to only think of herself. I found this to be a really powerful part in the book. This action proves how wonderful of a person she truly is. Even though this was a terrible time in her life I think it taught her a meaningful life lesson. I think she learned that friends and families are the most important thing in life and the relationships should always be valued.
I agree with Britt. I have a special connection to Gerda and Ilse's relationship because I also have a friend that I consider a sister. We have been through hard times together, but of course nothing compared to Gerda and Ilse. I do not always get along with my sister, just like Gerda does not always get along with my sister, but having that connection with someone, through thick and thin, can really teach you how important it is to value your friends and family. I can not say if I like the book or not, it is a collection of memories. I think she does a job of describing her memories, it is certainly not just a re-telling of her experience. One can learn a lot by reading her book, I think it gives you a different look at life. You learn to appreciate what you have, because we do not really have to worry about our lives or our families being taken away from us. My reaction to this book is more an internal, personal one, not an opinion of whether I liked it or not. -Eva
Gerda has definitely proven herself as a selfless person. Despite her pain and suffering, she still manages to put others before herself. As Britt said, the fact that Gerda offers to split her tiny meal with her friend is striking. I at first thought that maybe it was because of the desperate circumstances that she made these sacrifices, but even when she is recovering in the hospital after the war ends, she declines the money that Kurt offers her. She claims, "God knows I needed money, for I owned nothing, but I felt I could not accept it" (223). As selfless as she is though, Gerda still needs someone to be there for her. I am glad she met Kurt. Of course she is grateful for the war being over, but it seems like she would not have been able to cope with her thoughts immediately following her experiences without Kurt. He has been like a savior for her, allowing her to feel "safe and at peace at last" (236). Without Kurt, Gerda would have barely anything to live for, and I believe that he has even helped her to heal faster, physically and especially emotionally.
I totally agree with Britt. This book is really addicting and can attach you to the characters so easily. By having Gerda tell her story first hand, it projects an authenticness to the story that many other books cannot possess. Gerda gives her opinion and with it comes extreme facts about the German imprisonment of Jews. However, I agree with Britt about how interesting and attractive Gerda's character is. At one point Gerda says, "[o]ne I gave to Ilse," which was when Gerda gave Ilse the poison so that they wouldn't be forced to perform sexual favors for the German men (179). In order to help out her and her friend she sells her mom's pendant, which has extreme sentimental value for her.
DISCUSSION PROMPT #4: What are your final reactions to this book? Don't forget to try to draw connections between specific evidence and broader themes, and to acknowledge each other's posts!
This book was really mood evoking and emotional. I would freely and openly recommend this book to anyone looking for a good read. I am very happy that she found someone in the very end also. One theme that popped out at me a lot was separation. Gerda becomes separated from everyone she knows in the book. Her mother, father, Arthur, Ilse and Abek all become separated from her, including a few others. When Abek's family dies Gerda immediately thinks about her own family. Gerda thinks, "when i put down the letter, I felt anew all the pain I had suffered at separation from Papa and Mama" (135). Anything can set off her sadness and fear of separation. What is also interesting is that any separation reminds her of the separation that initiated everything else. Another strange theme that I came across in the book was perseverance. Gerda seems to have these sad suicidal thoughts recur throughout the book and yet she always seems to persevere. Gerda's father had turned to Gerda, "grasping [her] neck to make [her] look into his eyes, forcing [her] to promise that [she] would never give up" (150).
Matt brings up a really great point of the theme of perseverance. Without Gerda’s determination she never would have made it through all that she did. She stayed strong and also helped many other people stay as strong as they could.
Reviewing our old posts I came across what Eva said about the book, “it gives you a different look at life. You learn to appreciate what you have, because we do not really have to worry about our lives or our families being taken away from us.” I agree with every word she said. This book really does give life a different look. I do not wake up everyday wondering if I will be kicked out of my own house, or whether I will be separated from my family. What Eva said really makes me think of grateful I am for the life I live today. It really gets me thinking of how thankful I am to have my family, especially after a holiday where I had the opportunity to spend with them.
Therefore after thinking about what Eva said I think a major theme in this book is valuing not only relationships but also everything life has to offer. Everyday we take advantage of so many things. In the book Gerda receives an orange for her birthday from her mom and says, “I hadn’t seen one in almost three years” (82). I can not even imagine what it is like to have never seen an orange for three years, and I think I speak for many of us. Oranges do not even cross my mind most days, which is a perfect example of how we take advantage of things. To Gerda an orange is something to treasure, but to us it is just a piece of fruit we can buy anywhere. There is also a time where Gerda receives milk for the first time and the first thing she says again is “Milk!-I hadn’t had any in three years” (217). This book teaches the reader that everything in life is something to appreciate, even something as small as an orange.
Thank you, Britt, I am honored. Not to be redundant, but I agree with Britt as well on her second point. I think this book teaches us something valuable about relationships and really seeing the value in things. I remember hearing stories about people like Art Spiegelman's father who saved everything because they had to to survive, but I think this book teaches a different side of that. Gerda sees the things that are imprortant to her taken away, so she learns that life can not be taken for granted. That was one of the reactions I had to this book that I noticed the most. It really makes you think about the thing you have in your life, both material and emotional, and remember that you should not take them for granted, because they might not always be there. -Eva
I agree with all you guys. This book is something that makes us all step back and put life into perspective. We go along out daily lives hardly finished lunch and wasting water and don’t think twice about it. Gerda went everyday of the war wishing there were more to eat and drink. When she finally comes to America and lives freely she is so much more grateful than everyone else for the food on her table because she had been without it: “I loved going to grocery stores and still do. I needed to convince myself of the abundance of available good and of its never-ending supply. I wanted the assurance of never being hungry again” (249). I kept imagining myself and my friends in Gerda’s situation but I couldn’t. The holocaust is one event I will never be able to wrap my head around completely because it is too colossal. Another theme I notice occurred frequently is hope. Gerda always had more hope than anyone else and sometimes she didn’t. However, it seemed to fluctuate on a scale throughout the whole memoir shifting frequently. I think that hope shaped Gerda into the person she is. When one is in such a tragic seeming situation as the holocaust, hope is the only real thing keeping you going. Gerda hoped for many things, seeing her family again, her brothers well-being, to see the end of the war, and a healthy life for her and Ilse among many other things. I would recommend this book to anyone in a second. It portrays one version of the Holocaust in eyes that are realistic for us to see out of.
I agree that All But My Life was very enjoyable. Although we have read many similar stories, this book seemed like a fresh approach, another fascinating story about a Holocaust survivor. A lesson that can be learned from Gerda’s moving story is selflessness. Despite the pain and despair she is forced to suffer through and the awful conditions she has to grow up in, Gerda upholds her high morals and remembers to be there for the people around her. Throughout the novel, Gerda makes sacrifices for others. Britt talked about how Gerda treasured the first orange she got to eat in years, yet she still insists that her parents each take a piece. As the war is nearing to an end and Gerda’s life is being stretched thinner than ever, she manages to get her hands on a loaf of bread, but instead of nourishing her own sickly body, she divvies up the bread among “a dozen hands stretched toward [her]” (206). Matt talked about how she is separated from basically everyone in life that she has even known or loved, yet she still is able to realize that there is more to life than her feelings and losses in the present. Gerda seems to have kept the future in sight throughout her entire struggle, and if she didn’t I wonder whether she could have made as far as she did.
I was born and raised in Saint Louis, Missouri and first moved to Massachusetts to attend Amherst College, where I majored in both English and Russian literature. After graduation, I accepted a Fulbright Scholarship to the University of Tartu in Estonia, where I studied children's literature and semiotics ("the study of signs and symbols"). I returned to the United States to spend a few years exploring the wide world of business, but the classroom kept calling. It was high time to earn my Masters in Education from Tufts University and join the staff at Arlington High School.
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Just a friendly reminder that class calendars are subject to change. Sometimes I make mistakes (it's true!) and sometimes we just move a little more or less quickly than predicted. I will announce any changes in class and try to post them as quickly as possible on the blog. You are responsible for any updates made in class.
DISCUSSION PROMPT #1: What were your initial reactions to the reading?
ReplyDeleteOne thought ... if a generic "first reaction" is hard to get your head around, consider posting the most memorable moment in the book so far, and why you think it's important. Have fun!
ReplyDeleteI have really enjoyed reading the first six chapter of All But My Life. So far it is very interesting. The most memorable part of the book so far for me is when Gerda is thinking about a family who committed suicide and she wished her family had considered it as well. Her father does not have the ability to read minds, but he just knew that those thoughts were going through her head. He made her promise that no matter what happened she would never rely on suicide as an escape method. She said that with many more years ahead of her she “remembered that promise as [her] most sacred vow” (32). After reading the first six chapters it seems as though when Gerda makes a promise to someone or when someone tells her something important she cherishes it. She does not just make the promise and then later on forget about it. Another example when Gerda cherishes words that are spoken to her was when she was talking with her brother. He gave her a few pieces of glass and told her to keep the faith and to never forget it. Just like when she was told by her father, she never forgot those words. I think that her remembering all these words is important because it might have gotten her through all the horrible times. She might have been on her last string and then suddenly remembered what her father or brother had told her and remembering those words made her stay strong. As we continue reading maybe we will find evidence for this.
ReplyDelete-Britt
I agree with Britt; the mere fact that Gerda is considering suicide as one of her few possibilities is very disturbing. I'm also glad that she has respect for her father's wishes to never succumb to that desire to just escape reality once and for all. To continue that thought, it seems that everyone in Gerda’s family has a lot of respect for one another. They are always looking out for one another to keep them safe, but at the same time they are not so constricting that they cause unhappiness or discomfort. One of the first examples we see of this closeness is when Gerda and Arthur’s Papa ask for his children to go to Poland with neighbors to keep safe. Arthur immediately responds by saying, “No! We are going to stay together” (6). Many nights Gerda sits by her sick father’s bedside to keep close to him for both of their sakes. She even goes against what seems to be her nature to lie to her parents about the falsely reported well-being of her brother Arthur. I think that as the book goes on, Gerda’s closeness and trust with her family will help in the struggle to survive, as it helped countless other Jewish families during the Nazi Holocaust.
ReplyDelete--Deirdre
Both of you have great ideas on the opening of the book and about Gerda's idea of suicide. What absolutely confuses me is that Gerda and her family seem to be so clueless to the fact that the Polish cannot defend themselves. Also, they seem not to care if the Polish lose the war because they want to stay at home. Wouldn't it seem to be an obvious decision to try to protect your family to leave? The mother says their main concern is taking care of her husband. However, her husband may be dead if he stays anyways. I simply cannot get past the fact that they are so naive to the danger right in front of their faces. I was also wondering why Gerda seemed to make such a small deal about the letter from a friend in Turkey saying that they could come to stay with him. It seems they had opportunities to leave with a good reason to leave, but they stayed without a good reason. Finally, because Gerda writes poor english, I feel like her symbolism is forced and sometimes confusing. For example, the changing of the Polish flag to the Nazi flag could have been portrayed better and been given a deeper meaning. The first time I read that page I had to reread because the flag scene confused me.
ReplyDelete---Matt
When I was starting the book, I thought that I would not be able to know what it was like to be her. This is almost a shame because to know what it is like to be someone else can help expand you as a person and connect to people, and what we are reading can teach us so much about being humans. I was surprised at the end that I was more willing to imagine what it would be like to be her, as hard as it was. I marveled at how her life could keep going on, and I think she did not understand, either. While I was reading and she was talking about how there was a silence over the family, I felt like I could feel that silence over them. Like, it was too much to face, and they could not admit what was going to themselves, let alone each other. I think this book will be hard to read, but I hope to learn something from it.
ReplyDelete-Eva
I agree with Britt and Deirdre especially. When I first started reading this book, I was anxious to see how the Holocaust would play into Gerda’s story. I was surprised to find how subtly it incorporated into her life. Her family was not driven away from their home, they weren’t forced into camps, the actually hid very well. What stood out to me most was the relationship of the family. I think it is beautiful and very honest that they stayed together during these hard times. Because, even though their fate seems pretty doomed, they might as well stay together and make the most of it. What stood out to me most was how Gerda kept such a secret from her family. She knew all along that her brother Arthur wasn’t necessarily safe and that their family was receiving false information, but she didn’t tell her mother or father. I think it is clear that she did this because she wanted to protect them. For once, her family had the opportunity to be joyous and she wanted to keep it that way. I think that this shows a lot about Gerda’s character. She has good intentions but never is really sure when to draw the line. She is still young and I bet that we will learn how this lack of maturity affects her decision making. Though telling her parents was acceptable since Arthur turned out to be safe anyway, if he was dead and they had no idea, it would be far more traumatizing in the end.
ReplyDelete--hannah
DISCUSSION PROMPT #2: What are your reactions to Gerda's separation from her parents? What do you think you would have done?
ReplyDeleteIt's awful that Gerda was separated from her parents and soon afterward learned of their deaths, but to look on the bright side, I think she is very lucky compared to other children during the Holocaust. Firstly, she is taken to a camp where she is treated almost with respect by the director and even more so by Frau Kugler, as opposed to being treated as if unworthy of living in a concentration camp, which was a common fate of many Jews her age. She also is able to maintain contact with Abek and her uncle in Turkey, and remain with her childhood friend Ilse for many months. Despite her separation from her parents, Gerda manages to keep her spirits up (as much as possible). If I were in her shoes, I would not have had the strength that Gerda maintains. For example, the first day that she is sent to a camp, she goes into the director's office without permission and demands a pass to Abek's family, which ended up gaining her the respect of the director, a benefit later on. I also don't think I would have had the courage and integrity that Gerda has displayed, such as when she declines the offer to stay with Abek's family because she knows she is not truly in love with him and can never reciprocate the sacrifices that he has made for her.
ReplyDelete-Deirdre
I forgot to add my quotation...
ReplyDeleteSo to support my point that Gerda does not want to marry Abek because she feels guilty about the sacrifices that he has made for her, on page 109 she says, "It occurred to me that if I refused to marry Abek, he would never demand it against my wishes. But I couldn't accept his family's sacrifice and reject him." I think it is noble of Gerda to not take the easy way out and stay with Abek's family, but instead to consider the long-term effects of this decision and recognize that she will never be able to love Abek and repay him for his sacrifices.
-Deirdre
From my first blog post I was wondering if there would be any times when Gerda would refer back to when she made the promise to her father that she would not commit suicide. As I continued reading I found that Gerda did mention her promise to her father. Gerda was contemplating committing suicide by jumping in front of a train, but each time she looked at the train she got a pain in her neck. She remembered when she was thinking about death at home when all of a sudden her father came up to her and took hold of her neck “to make [her] look into his eyes, forcing [her] to promise that [she] would never give up” (150). The pain she felt in her neck was a reminder of her promise.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Deirdre. The separation from her parents was a horrible thing that Gerda had to undergo, and if that was not enough she then learned of their deaths. If I was experiencing all these terrible things I never would have been as strong or as brave as Gerda was. If I were her I might have felt a little relieved knowing that my parents had passed away rather than not knowing at all. It would be a relief knowing that I would not have to wake up every morning wondering if they were dead or alive, or if they were being beaten or starved. I would know for a fact that they are no longer suffering and are in a happier place. They are together and are watching down on me, free from this misery. I also agree with Deirdre when she says that Gerda is lucky is to have Ilse. Having a friend through all this makes the worst situations seem a little better. You can tell that Ilse really cares about Gerda. Ilse is always there for her when she needs someone, and is always there to hold her hand. For example when they are being transferred they are both so scared but they are lucky they have each other. They have each others shoulders to cry on rather than being alone. Also Ilse risks her own life to help Gerda. Gerda was so thankful that she could not even say thank you, she “had no words” (152). I would have been in the same position, speechless.
-Britt
I totally agree with Deirdre. It is obvious to see how painful it would be to be separated from one's parents especially when Gerda and her family vowed they would stay together early in the book. However, the fact that they assumed that they may actually last together gives me the impression that they were somewhat traumatized and naive to the Nazi invasions.
ReplyDeleteI feel true pity for Gerda because that was what was keeping her sane and together. Also, I believe that Abek's parents helped Gerda a lot too and once they are dead she feels so truly alone. Although she keeps contact with Abek she still feels closer to his parents than him. After Gerda reads Abek's letter she thinks, "[w]hen i put down the letter, I felt anew all the pain I had suffered at separation from Papa and Mama. I was afraid of the future. Abek's parents were gone too, and i felt closer to them than to Abek. They were no more" (135). I believe that the quotation shows that Gerda's separation from her parents was one of the saddest moments that she will always remember.
---Matt
Sorry, also I do not think it is fair to think about IF we were in Gerda's shoes. The pain must be indescribable, and I cannot imagine what it would be like to have so much happen to me and have my dreams shattered as hers were. The only thing that she now has is Abek, and although she likes him, I still feel the distance she is trying to create between them.
ReplyDelete---Matt
I thought it was very weird how she reacted to her separation, but it was the better option. She gains strength and independence, which is essential for living after the war. She gains a liberty if not having their fate in her hands. I thought when I read that that it was very odd and exactly the opposite of what my reaction would have been. She came to life when they were separated, and I would have died. I think all my strength would have dissipated then. I almost wonder what she was living for, and I think she did, too, but she still had hope and she had her friends. I keep thinking that she reacts differently because her life growing up must have been different than mine, but from how she describes it, I do not think it really was. She was not all that strong when this all started, I wonder why she did not cave in? I think her parents' and her brother's last words to her to be strong guided her, and when I realy think about it, it seems like that would have been enough.
ReplyDelete-Eva
I agree with all of you guys. Gerda deals with her pain and hard times with an unfathomable amount of courage. She knows that she must make the best out of a nightmare. I think all her days leading up to this point allowed her to be stronger. For months living in a basement without her brother and knowing what was happening all around her, she was expecting it. We can see from her journey just how much she has come mentally. She turned 16 and really grew up then. Not only did she know enough to not accept Abek’s proposal, she dealt with it maturely. I really understood how she feels when she read his book and was annoyed by him because of it. Clearly she cares deeply for him, but marriage is all about love, and she quite obviously doesn’t love him.
ReplyDeleteAs for when she is separated from her family, and then finds out about her parents death, I am almost surprised about her reactions to this. Personally, I have no clue as to how I would handle a situation like this, but Gerda remains strong. I think that at a point she realizes there is nothing to lose, so she needs to stay as free-willed as possible. Although it helps that she has it easy to many other Jews her age, her parents are still gone. Her parents and her had made the journey to the camps together. They all helped each other in many ways to survive the long wait to their fate, and to see her without them is weary. At least she has Abek’s parents to fill in some sort of void of comfort inside her because I don’t think that Abek does that very well.
-Hannah
DISCUSSION PROMPT #3: What are your final reactions to the book??
ReplyDeleteEven though we have not finished the book yet, I love it. As you all know, on a scale from one to ten I give this book a 9.5. I feel so attached to Gerda and Ilse. The friendship that they have formed is so strong. It is something to admire the fact that they are always there for each other. Something as simple as holding hands shows their love and support for one another and it is beautiful. I find Gerda to be such a kind, caring, and thoughtful person. She is always thinking of others and never just herself. When Gerda was hired for her new job she was given an extra bowl of food, the first thing that came to her mind was that “Ilse and I [will] not be hungry any more…” (176). At a horrible time like this, when you are battling day and night for your life you would think someone would keep the food for themselves. That extra bowl of food could be the deciding point of whether you live another day or not. Gerda is too kind to only think of herself. I found this to be a really powerful part in the book. This action proves how wonderful of a person she truly is. Even though this was a terrible time in her life I think it taught her a meaningful life lesson. I think she learned that friends and families are the most important thing in life and the relationships should always be valued.
ReplyDelete-Britt
I agree with Britt. I have a special connection to Gerda and Ilse's relationship because I also have a friend that I consider a sister. We have been through hard times together, but of course nothing compared to Gerda and Ilse. I do not always get along with my sister, just like Gerda does not always get along with my sister, but having that connection with someone, through thick and thin, can really teach you how important it is to value your friends and family.
ReplyDeleteI can not say if I like the book or not, it is a collection of memories. I think she does a job of describing her memories, it is certainly not just a re-telling of her experience. One can learn a lot by reading her book, I think it gives you a different look at life. You learn to appreciate what you have, because we do not really have to worry about our lives or our families being taken away from us. My reaction to this book is more an internal, personal one, not an opinion of whether I liked it or not.
-Eva
Gerda has definitely proven herself as a selfless person. Despite her pain and suffering, she still manages to put others before herself. As Britt said, the fact that Gerda offers to split her tiny meal with her friend is striking. I at first thought that maybe it was because of the desperate circumstances that she made these sacrifices, but even when she is recovering in the hospital after the war ends, she declines the money that Kurt offers her. She claims, "God knows I needed money, for I owned nothing, but I felt I could not accept it" (223). As selfless as she is though, Gerda still needs someone to be there for her. I am glad she met Kurt. Of course she is grateful for the war being over, but it seems like she would not have been able to cope with her thoughts immediately following her experiences without Kurt. He has been like a savior for her, allowing her to feel "safe and at peace at last" (236). Without Kurt, Gerda would have barely anything to live for, and I believe that he has even helped her to heal faster, physically and especially emotionally.
ReplyDelete--Deirdre
I totally agree with Britt. This book is really addicting and can attach you to the characters so easily. By having Gerda tell her story first hand, it projects an authenticness to the story that many other books cannot possess. Gerda gives her opinion and with it comes extreme facts about the German imprisonment of Jews. However, I agree with Britt about how interesting and attractive Gerda's character is. At one point Gerda says, "[o]ne I gave to Ilse," which was when Gerda gave Ilse the poison so that they wouldn't be forced to perform sexual favors for the German men (179). In order to help out her and her friend she sells her mom's pendant, which has extreme sentimental value for her.
ReplyDelete---Matt
DISCUSSION PROMPT #4: What are your final reactions to this book? Don't forget to try to draw connections between specific evidence and broader themes, and to acknowledge each other's posts!
ReplyDeleteThis book was really mood evoking and emotional. I would freely and openly recommend this book to anyone looking for a good read. I am very happy that she found someone in the very end also. One theme that popped out at me a lot was separation. Gerda becomes separated from everyone she knows in the book. Her mother, father, Arthur, Ilse and Abek all become separated from her, including a few others. When Abek's family dies Gerda immediately thinks about her own family. Gerda thinks, "when i put down the letter, I felt anew all the pain I had suffered at separation from Papa and Mama" (135). Anything can set off her sadness and fear of separation. What is also interesting is that any separation reminds her of the separation that initiated everything else. Another strange theme that I came across in the book was perseverance. Gerda seems to have these sad suicidal thoughts recur throughout the book and yet she always seems to persevere. Gerda's father had turned to Gerda, "grasping [her] neck to make [her] look into his eyes, forcing [her] to promise that [she] would never give up" (150).
ReplyDelete---Matt
Matt brings up a really great point of the theme of perseverance. Without Gerda’s determination she never would have made it through all that she did. She stayed strong and also helped many other people stay as strong as they could.
ReplyDeleteReviewing our old posts I came across what Eva said about the book, “it gives you a different look at life. You learn to appreciate what you have, because we do not really have to worry about our lives or our families being taken away from us.” I agree with every word she said. This book really does give life a different look. I do not wake up everyday wondering if I will be kicked out of my own house, or whether I will be separated from my family. What Eva said really makes me think of grateful I am for the life I live today. It really gets me thinking of how thankful I am to have my family, especially after a holiday where I had the opportunity to spend with them.
Therefore after thinking about what Eva said I think a major theme in this book is valuing not only relationships but also everything life has to offer. Everyday we take advantage of so many things. In the book Gerda receives an orange for her birthday from her mom and says, “I hadn’t seen one in almost three years” (82). I can not even imagine what it is like to have never seen an orange for three years, and I think I speak for many of us. Oranges do not even cross my mind most days, which is a perfect example of how we take advantage of things. To Gerda an orange is something to treasure, but to us it is just a piece of fruit we can buy anywhere. There is also a time where Gerda receives milk for the first time and the first thing she says again is “Milk!-I hadn’t had any in three years” (217). This book teaches the reader that everything in life is something to appreciate, even something as small as an orange.
-Britt
Thank you, Britt, I am honored. Not to be redundant, but I agree with Britt as well on her second point. I think this book teaches us something valuable about relationships and really seeing the value in things. I remember hearing stories about people like Art Spiegelman's father who saved everything because they had to to survive, but I think this book teaches a different side of that. Gerda sees the things that are imprortant to her taken away, so she learns that life can not be taken for granted. That was one of the reactions I had to this book that I noticed the most. It really makes you think about the thing you have in your life, both material and emotional, and remember that you should not take them for granted, because they might not always be there.
ReplyDelete-Eva
I agree with all you guys. This book is something that makes us all step back and put life into perspective. We go along out daily lives hardly finished lunch and wasting water and don’t think twice about it. Gerda went everyday of the war wishing there were more to eat and drink. When she finally comes to America and lives freely she is so much more grateful than everyone else for the food on her table because she had been without it: “I loved going to grocery stores and still do. I needed to convince myself of the abundance of available good and of its never-ending supply. I wanted the assurance of never being hungry again” (249). I kept imagining myself and my friends in Gerda’s situation but I couldn’t. The holocaust is one event I will never be able to wrap my head around completely because it is too colossal.
ReplyDeleteAnother theme I notice occurred frequently is hope. Gerda always had more hope than anyone else and sometimes she didn’t. However, it seemed to fluctuate on a scale throughout the whole memoir shifting frequently. I think that hope shaped Gerda into the person she is. When one is in such a tragic seeming situation as the holocaust, hope is the only real thing keeping you going. Gerda hoped for many things, seeing her family again, her brothers well-being, to see the end of the war, and a healthy life for her and Ilse among many other things.
I would recommend this book to anyone in a second. It portrays one version of the Holocaust in eyes that are realistic for us to see out of.
-Hannah
I agree that All But My Life was very enjoyable. Although we have read many similar stories, this book seemed like a fresh approach, another fascinating story about a Holocaust survivor. A lesson that can be learned from Gerda’s moving story is selflessness. Despite the pain and despair she is forced to suffer through and the awful conditions she has to grow up in, Gerda upholds her high morals and remembers to be there for the people around her. Throughout the novel, Gerda makes sacrifices for others. Britt talked about how Gerda treasured the first orange she got to eat in years, yet she still insists that her parents each take a piece. As the war is nearing to an end and Gerda’s life is being stretched thinner than ever, she manages to get her hands on a loaf of bread, but instead of nourishing her own sickly body, she divvies up the bread among “a dozen hands stretched toward [her]” (206). Matt talked about how she is separated from basically everyone in life that she has even known or loved, yet she still is able to realize that there is more to life than her feelings and losses in the present. Gerda seems to have kept the future in sight throughout her entire struggle, and if she didn’t I wonder whether she could have made as far as she did.
ReplyDelete-Deirdre